week fourteen

Its the last week...the last real week. I'm so close, I can feel it. Pretty much every moment of my week has been planned out, down to the hour. It's ok though, because when it's done, I'm done.

Sunset from my bedroom window tonight.

home today

This morning I woke up around 10:45, which pretty much set the mood for the rest of my day.

I sat in my parents armchair by the fire curled up in my quilt most of the day. I am reading Bonhoeffer's book on community, it's wonderful. I devour his words. Sometime in the afternoon I looked out our big living room windows to see big white flakes falling from the sky. The clouds had set in and I could only see the first few feet of pine trees through the snow. It was a peaceful quiet afternoon.

Around 4:00 I decided to shower and brush my hair (highly overrated if you ask me). We, my family and I, ventured back over to my Grandma's house for round two of Thanksgiving dinner. My favorite part of the holiday really.

Over the last month or two of school I have been feeling myself becoming more tired each day, and sleep at night never seems to recover me. But this weekend has been restful, and definitely what I needed to get myself through this next two weeks.

Things I still need to do this semester:

Write my last Latin American lit paper.
Finish Bonhoeffer, write a paper.
Integrative paper for Bill's class.
Retreat for Bill's class.
One more Spanish test.
One more Empirical World test.
Finish editing last articles for Yearbook.

The end is near.

correspondence

just have to remember this

This evening I went to the Robeck's for dinner. It was typical chaos night, drinks were spilled, kids cried, dinner was awesome, and there was a lot of goofiness. Those are just a few reasons why I love their house.

Anyway, I was leaving and had said goodbye, passed out hugs and got into my car. I put it in drive and then out of the corner of my eye I see a little pajama wearing, barefoot boy running down the path from the house. I put my car quickly back in park and open the door as he is running around the front of my car, "Caleb what are you doing?" I ask as he jumps into my arms. He kisses me on the cheek and gives me a big hug and says in a this-is-obvious-I'm-not-sure-why-you're-asking sort of tone,

"You forgot to give me a kiss."

Then he ran his little barefoot self back up the path and went inside.

in which i find a cozy place...

So my previous boss and friend, Amanda, moved from one position to another at Vanguard recently. Really good move for her, we're all excited. Anyway, I went to have a one on one with her (see below) today and she was a few minutes late. In the front of her office is a brand new really cozy couch. So, me being me, I plopped myself down into it, got comfy among the six pillows on it and opened up my book. About 15 minutes later we left, and I had found myself a new spot to sit and read on campus. It's probably the most wonderful couch between Newport Blvd, Fairview and Vanguard Way.

While no one was looking I snuck a picture.

wisdom

"I wonder how many doors that we walk by, that if we opened, we would walk into and discover wonder."

-Bill Dogterom

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Sharon,

I have so much to tell you.
Tea sometime soon?

Ash

one on ones

There is a tradition at Vanguard that I have not seen in any other place. They are called, specifically, "one on ones". As a freshman I went into my first one with the premonition that said staff member would ask me questions all about myself and dissect me and tell me what I needed to work on. Like a sort of therapist. I was partially correct. 

What I have found however is that after one, maybe two of these relationship starts to happen and wisdom starts coming from so many places. This week, wait let me look at my calendar, I have 6 different coffee/lunch/breakfast dates with individual people whom I love. That is not counting the meals I will share with friends. 

This afternoon I am getting coffee with a beloved professor. I had a meeting with my SFO director already this afternoon and on Friday I am having lunch with a previous RD and friend. I feel like I am packed with people this week. It makes for a difficult time getting all my schoolwork done, however I'm sure most of my learning is supposed to happen outside of class anyway right? 

ashee's here!!

Favorite moment from yesterday:

Sitting in a fort made of a huge blanket stretched over the couch, chairs and the coffee table. We had blankets and pillows on the floor and games and books inside. Rebekah asked me to read to her, so while JM and Caleb went to get Coke, RRR and I read in our fort. Heaven for Ashley? Yes.

for you

Gram,

Right now I am sitting in my kitchen after a kinda long, but partly relaxing day, (I took a nap about halfway through it). I am about to register for classes next semester and keep reading for my literature class on Friday. I am writing this to you because I am having a cup of "Constant Comment" tea, and every time I do I think about you. I am really excited for Thanksgiving, and to see you so soon! I love you so much, tell Opa I love him too.

Love,

Ash

KKI

I took some pictures on my phone last night, while we were waiting. I'm on an event team for a non-profit some of my friends started. krochetkids.org.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r83QNXP_epA

lots of poetry in my life recently..

Thoughts

I love the Autumn,
And yet I cannot say
All the thoughts and things
That make me feel this way.

I love walking on the angry shore,
To watch the angry sea;
Where summer people were before,
But now there's only me.

I love wood fires at night
That have a ruddy glow.
I stare at the flames
And think of long ago.

I love the feeling down inside me
That says to run away
To come and be a gypsy
And laugh the gypsy way.

The tangy taste of apples,
The snowy mist at morn,
The wanderlust inside you
When you hear the huntsman's horn.

Nostalgia-that's the Autumn,
Dreaming through September
Just a million lovely things
I always will remember.

-Jacqueline Bouvier

community

Recently I've started going to a new church. It's pretty much wonderful, well mostly the people are wonderful. But that's the point right? Anyway Bethany, my friend Amy and I got invited by Heather (married to Matt, two beautiful little girls Madison and Clair) to come over for dinner this last week. She made taco salad and it was wonderful, as was the conversation. The girls were in and out and Matt came in toward the end but really struck me most was effortless hospitality.

She didn't make her house spotless. I love that. She spent time with us and really cares about what is going on in our lives. So good. It didn't take months of going to church with them for us to get together. I feel like this is true for most of the people that I am getting to know there. A lot of families have extra college students living with them, and feed us often. Growing up there were always a handful of people after church, lingering and talking. Here it seems that the whole church does. I feel apart of a family, when little kids are running around causing havoc after the service, around the older men and women talking and praying for each other. Its really how I feel that church should be. Family.

guy fawks day: a rememberance

Remember, remember, the 5th of November
The Gunpowder Treason and plot ;
I know of no reason why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes,
'Twas his intent.
To blow up the King and the Parliament.
Three score barrels of powder below.
Poor old England to overthrow.
By God's providence he was catch'd,
With a dark lantern and burning match

Holloa boys, Holloa boys, let the bells ring
Holloa boys, Holloa boys, God save the King!

What was I doing last year today? Sitting in a tutorial while fireworks went off consistently for more than an hour. Amanda made an effigy, we hung it on a tree, and burned Guy Fawks to the ground. 

starbucks: more than just water

I may have corrupted a child. 

Until Tuesday night Caleb, 3 years old, believed that Starbucks was a place to get big cups of water. "Mom can we go to Starbucks and get some water?" he says. I laughed and then asked, 

ADW: Caleb how come  you don't get any chocolaté at Starbucks? 

CMR: What? They don't have chocolaté, they just have water. 

ADW: No, they have really yummy chocolaté there. 

CMR: Mom can we go to Starbucks and get some chocolaté?

Cristina: Thanks Ashley. 

post dreaming

I'm having one of those great mornings again. I woke up a half hour before my alarm (get enough sleep, what a concept) and its cold and foggy in CM. I made tea, breakfast (toast is really good with cinnamon and sugar and nutmeg) and am now sitting at my desk looking out at the wonderful ocean fog.

Should I go to chapel? Yes. Will I? It's doubtful.

Last night our once-a-week-roommate Michelle was over. She walked in on Bethany and I having a conversation about all things beautiful (I miss Desirae, she was the one who taught me how to have those conversations). Then we started talking about adventures and traveling and by the end we were yelling about how much we wanted to pack our backpacks (we even made a list of the food items we would bring*) leaving in the middle of the night (not telling anyone) and go on some random crazy adventure. Showering would not happen, we would be hungry often, but we would write poetry and music. We would meet wonderful people along the way and have stories to tell.

Such a good morning.

*bread

peanut butter

(Jelly is a luxury)

honey

apples

water

things that can melt

I went to Santa Ana for dinner tonight. Before JM got home I was sitting on the couch with Rebekah working on "homework". The conversation went like this,

RRR: Do pumpkins melt?
ADW: No they sorta rot, and get moldy..
RRR: (after telling me the story of her moldy pumpkin) What else melts?
ADW: ummmm...
RRR: Ice!
ADW: Yup! and chocolate melts, like MandMs.
RRR: plastic melts.
ADW: Who melts when you throw water on her?
RRR: The wicked witch!
ADW: What else melts?
RRR: Snowflakes!
ADW: Oh ya thats a good one!

For some reason, later, I was sitting there covering my eyes. I asked her, "Do you see colours when you close your eyes?"

RRR: No.
ADW: Close your eyes and try!
RRR: Oh ya I see yellow and red and green.
ADW: What are the shapes?

(remember we are now sitting on the couch together holding our hands up over our eyes talking)

RRR: Like circles and spots.
ADW: Do you see them moving?
RRR: How did you know?! Here, try your hands on my eyes and maybe I'll see the same colours you did!

What else melts? Delicious pot roast in my mouth and rolls that are sweet and buttery. The stress in my life melts when I go to the Robeck's for dinner. Oh ya, and my heart when Caleb and Rebekah sit on the couch-practically in my lap-with me.

november

This afternoon I wandered into my favorite fruit and vegetable market in CM. I haven't been in a while, since the summer actually. Says something about my diet recently doesn't it?

Out front, of course, were the marked down pumpkins. The reject gourdes that have lasted until after Halloween. 99cents each and still no one really wants them. I also passed by and walked in. I was immediately excited about everything I saw. Sure, your normal vegetables are there; beans and lettuce and the like. But I saw hazelnuts, fresh picked apples, persimmons, pomegranates and blackberries. These things to me are the the brilliance of fall, and only a little glimmer of hope for a fall in Orange County. Lets just say blackberry pie, apple crisp, roasted hazelnuts and pomegranates that last for days are some of my favorite things.

All those and a cup of tea.

when want turns into need..

I spent an evening in La Mirada this weekend. It was, as always, full of tea and incredible. Christy and Amanda are like a breath of fresh air to me. They are positive and encouraging and the things we talk about are things I only get to talk about with them. There was much laughter and cuddling. At any rate, they live in the house that has more bookshelves than DVDs. My favorite part of this house is the sheer volume of books in it. Books on the piano, books stacked on the floor, books in stacks on the tables and bookshelves in every room. This one is my favorite. Something I hope to be able to have enough books to do someday.

Books arranged by colour.